Today I shall discuss fashion, and share a wonderful fashion tip that I received (like a blow to the solar plexus) at the hands of sales person at a certain department store (originally based in the Pacific Northwest, with a reputation for excellence in shoes and customer service, name begins with an ‘n’… ). Ok I don’t know why I am protecting the store, it didn’t do anything to me, and it wasn’t even the sales clerk that I was dealing with that handed me the little tip that has me all aquiver. But don’t let me get ahead of my story.
Saturday my lovely spouse had to stop by the above-mentioned clothier to pick up a pair of trousers he was having altered, so I opted to go along for the ride. I had had my eye on a certain pair of boots, which I wanted to try. (For some inexplicable reason I am craving winter clothing – summer clothing is such a bummer, always seems to be cheaply made, never seems to fit right, often is made out of fabrics that don’t breathe – hello, who wants to wear synthetics when its hovering near 98 degrees? Perhaps I should start buying my summer wardrobe at the store I am not naming in this little flame rather than Old Navy!) We arrive at the mall, I am dressed in my Saturday best, consisting of a bright green tank and a fetching pair of ratty cut offs (very Daisy Duke – I am so pop culture). I stop in ladies shoes; Spouse goes off to fetch his trou. I assume he is going to come back after he gets his pants to see me in my glory with the objects of my chocolate boot lust. The sales guy, who is helping me quickly learns that I have no dignity and love a good joke, and comments, “Now that is a look” as I am waltzing around in my shorts and OBVIOUSLY wintry boots. I spy Spouse lurking in men’s shoes (Spouse is as big a shoe ho as I am), and my sales guy suggests that I go over to show him. I take the suggestion and prance over to men’s shoes. Now I am fully aware that the look I am sporting is not in the trade rags this season, in fact I think it came in and went out the same day that Barbarella was released. NOT THAT THERE IS ANYTHING WRONG WITH THAT MIND YOU, and should you choose to walk around in public dressed in such a fashion more power to you. Spouse spots me, and I call out, “What do you think”? Before he can answer me, a sales woman in men’s shoes says to me “Those boots are supposed to be worn tucked into jeans.” Gobsmacked I tell you!
- I didn’t ask you
- The customer is always right
- SUPPOSED! When did shoes, or any other garment for that matter, come with a manual of dos and don’ts . I was well aware that I was a walking Glamour Don’t, but then again I was only trying the boots on!
- Unsolicited advice is rarely welcome
- Tucked into jeans? Hello, did that in 1982, don’t need to and won’t do it again.
- SUPPOSED!
- Did I ask you?
- Let she who has never committed a fashion faux pas cast the first stone Miss “I dressed in the dark” sales person
- Hello, were either of us addressing you?
- SUPPOSED?
Now perhaps she felt that she was saving me from a life of fashion faux pas, but rillly! And if so, there are a thousand other ways to offer the suggestion such as ; “Those boots look great tucked into jeans.” SUPPOSED? So the fashion police will prosecute me if I wear them in any other way? It is not my right as an able bodied adult to dress in any way I choose? If I choose to dress like a trashy ole ho, then I will bloody well do it! If I choose to wear Manolos and drape myself in Lion Brand “Fun Fetti” yarn and ride through town barebacked on my horse then I will do it!
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